Resistance vs. Art

I’m reading a book right now that is actually,reading me. How dare it have the audacity to call me out on my bullshit?

The book is:

“The War of Art” by Steven Pressfield.

He’s the screenwriter for “The Legend of Bagger Vance.” A film I have yet to see and maybe never will. I doubt Steven cares if I see it. He’s got enough eyes on his work than he can count. He’s a professional. I’m an amateur. He details that in a way that is so concise and accurate. Not because he’s “made it” in the literary world but simply because I haven’t carried myself in such a way that makes me a professional,and that’s what distinguishes me from him.

I don’t wake up every morning and do the work.

But I will sort of ask myself “Why am I getting no attention for my work.”

I have to check myself when I catch myself complain. Truly,professionals don’t wait for inspiration. They go create it. They sit at the laptop or at the craft or at the easel or mic,or whatever medium is needed,and create the inspiration to the next piece of art.

I finally had to sit with myself and ask myself why I’m so afraid of putting in the same amount of work I would Put in,for a job I knew I was getting a paycheck for. The job I dream of,doesn’t exist. It will only exist,if I wake up everyday and create it myself.

The other day I almost convinced myself to go to law school. It’s the last resort. It’s the thing I go to,when I’m terrified of making the art I was born to create.

You might have a series of these thoughts too. Maybe social work or nursing. Maybe you suddenly thought it was a good time to have a child or buy a house or get married. Maybe you are finding lots of things at spur of the moments that are thoughts of resistance.

Now. Having a child or engaging in marriage is not a negative thing. While those are all beautiful experiences. Sometimes we have to ask ourselves if we are burying ourselves or being authentic in our decisions. Are we hiding ourselves in relationships? Are we submerging ourselves into things to avoid facing ourselves and the beauty that we were meant to extend to the world.

Many of times when I don’t have much going for myself in life I catch myself thinking about having a child. As if I am

worthless without producing something. As if the art I have in me,is invaluable.

Perhaps I simply had to become aware of this person because of this book that is changing my life for the better, by ripping me apart.

Let me explain more.

In the book Steven talks about how we allow resistance to take us away from the actual work we were born to do. The constant battle between Ego and the inner self. The millions of excuses we tell ourselves to get away from being, great.

He speaks of Resistance,like a villain in a movie against ourselves. Except in this story,we are our own villains.

Resistance dresses itself in many forms.

It peaks it’s head in when we are most inspired.

We will wash dishes,take care of others,call people to find out about their problems,take on responsibilities that weren’t ours to begin with,find jobs we don’t enjoy or know why we even applied,Bury ourselves in entertainment or food. Anything just to get away,from our inspired self.

Resistance is the phone call that will come in right while we sat down to write our 3rd book,and convince us that the dialogue on the phone is more important than our work.

For me,it’s sleep. I could be sleeping right now and that’s what resistance wants. I’m not even tired. But I can tell you that I’ve fallen asleep many times just to get away from writing. For years.

I recall staying up until 2am some nights. Wide awake and inspired by my passion to simply sing or create. These days I convince myself that I will be grouchy in the morning if I don’t get enough rest. I seldom push myself to the levels of near delusion that actually used to form the most inspired work of my life or writing career.

We fear what lies behind greatness because we may be called to continue to produce more great work. We feel we might fail,so why try at all?

Steven Pressfield expresses how many scripts were rejected in his life before finally getting a shot late into his 40’s.

He speaks of resistance being,a literal mess. Laundry. Or the times we spend rearranging our closet by color and size,just to get far from our calling.

I resonate with that.

I will clean my home or wipe kitchen counters for 2 hours before sitting and writing.

We fear being great will have me finding odd things to do or find things that don’t even need doing.

If you are an artist,what you must know is. Inspiration will sometimes wake you at 3am.

But inspiration may very well be, at the other side of resistance. And maybe the other way to beat Resistance Is to sit down,put resistance out of business and do the dam thing. Whatever that is. Like Nike says, Just do it.